Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Ho! Ho! 06!

The Beating Wand

Good-bye 2006. What a year it has been. I just finished going through my show notes from the past year and thought I would point out a few news story highlights from the year that stuck out at me. Consider this a free form year in review.

Let us begin.
Pat Robertson leg presses 50,000 lbs - Skating with the stars - Chris Penn ate self to death - Cartoons start riots - Paula Abdul seeks help from Dr. Phil - A&G death threat on myspace - autistic high school basketball player lights it up - Gigante pro-immigration rallies across the US - The A&G beard growing contest - Whitney Houston is a toothless drug/sex fiend - McKinney goes nuts - The Pickler - Snakes on a Plane - Tom Hank's mullet - Gavin's new haircut - Mel Gibson's DUI - John Mark "get out of my" Karr - Croc Hunter - ......

I think you know the rest - TomKitten - Suri - Baby Shilo - Vince Vaughn, KFED, Britney's privates & Rumy OUT! - Dems IN! - Kramer goes insane - yada yada yda.

See you in 07.

Scott

Ho! Ho! 06!

The Beating Wand

Good-bye 2006. What a year it has been. I just finished going through my show notes from the past year and thought I would point out a few news story highlights from the year that stuck out at me. Consider this a free form year in review.

Let us begin.
Pat Robertson leg presses 50,000 lbs - Skating with the stars - Chris Penn ate self to death - Cartoons start riots - Paula Abdul seeks help from Dr. Phil - A&G death threat on myspace - autistic high school basketball player lights it up - Gigante pro-immigration rallies across the US - The A&G beard growing contest - Whitney Houston is a toothless drug/sex fiend - McKinney goes nuts - The Pickler - Snakes on a Plane - Tom Hank's mullet - Gavin's new haircut - Mel Gibson's DUI - John Mark "get out of my" Karr - Croc Hunter - ......

I think you know the rest - TomKitten - Suri - Baby Shilo - Vince Vaughn, KFED, Britney's privates & Rumy OUT! - Dems IN! - Kramer goes insane - yada yada yda.

See you in 07.

Scott

Monday, November 20, 2006

Nina "You Broke My" Hartley

The Beating Wand

Who I would like to give The Beating Wand to today....

I would like to give the beating wand to Nina Hartley, porn star/author of "Nina Hartley's Guide to Total Sex." Nina was scheduled for an interview at 9:04 this morning and failed to answer our phone call. Lucky for us, Armstrong & Getty are pro's (No Nina, not that kind of pro) and bounced back from your "no show" in flying colors.

I happen to know from your publisher that you were in San Francisco today, so I can only guess you have a valid reason for not being in the ready position this morning. But for amusement sake, let me rattle off a list of possible scenarios that kept you from us while you were in our fair foggy city...

1) You were still at the Power Exchange, hand-cuffed to a sleeping monkey.
2) Too busy selling books out of the back of your car in the Tenderloin.
3) (Insert Coit Tower joke here)

You know Nina, I retract my wanting to give you The Beating Wand.
You'd probably enjoy it.

Monday, October 23, 2006

NO SHOW GUEST

The Beating Wand

Who I would like to give the beating wand to today....

I would like to give the beating wand to Chris Gardner, author of "Pursuit of Happyness." Chris was scheduled for an interview at 9:04 this morning, and pulled a NO SHOW! Thanks a lot Chris! Too bad for you, we stand by our oath: "Any one who pulls a no show on our program is dead to us." You now join the ranks of Arianna Huffington, Christoper Darten and others. Congratulations.

How about you change your book title from "Pursuit of Happyness" to "Pursuit of Getting My Ass to the Interview on Time!"

Friday, July 21, 2006

WELCOME

Welcome to The Beating Wand. Stay tuned for details, coming soon.